MINDFULNESS

healing & cleansing

what is mindfulness?

Mindfulness involves being a non-judgmental, compassionate, observer of your inner dialogue, beliefs, thoughts, and emotions. This observer is referred to as "Wise Mind" in DBT or simply "Self" in IFS.

wise mind

The simplest way to access 'Wise Mind' is to observe your thoughts, emotions, senses, and bodily sensations (tension, breath, etc.). Wise Mind is in the calm, compassionate 'witness' to it all. According to IFS Self Leadership, this wise mindful aspect is referred to as 'Self' and has the 8 C's as shown above.

cleaning subconscious

There are layers to psychological healing and cleansing. Similar to cleaning a basement that has been neglected for years. There are boxes to go through and 'old stuff' to discover, clean, and organize. This requires work and dedication! Albeit, transformational work. 

1

AWARENESS

Accessing Wise Mind ('Self') by detangling from our thoughts and emotions, is an essential first step.

2

ACCEPTANCE

Feeling feelings and allowing thoughts to surface. Observe, validate, own, and unconditionally accept.

3

practice

If you truly desire emotional health, and a 'tidy' mind then you need to learn skills and practice consistent emotional hygiene.

 

what works vs what doesn't

In order to provide an understanding of what mindfulness cleansing looks like - it may be best to describe what it is, and what it isn't. 

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Emotional and psychological wounds are not resolved by recalling a few memories and “ah-ha” moments like you may have seen in movies.

WHAT WORKS

Leaning in and embracing your pain as you would embrace a crying child. Real healing and transformation from old habits and symptoms require feeling your feelings.

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Trying to think or analyze our way into healing. Emotions do not stem the frontal cortex, where rationale and thinking exists. Over-thinking can pop us out of our feelings and sabotage healing work.

WHAT WORKS

Having curiosity to see, hear, value and understand what is underneath the painful emotion. It takes practice - days, weeks, months of practice (and continued practice) until you are able to shift old subconscious programming to become your new default.

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Attempting to search outside yourself (people, things, etc.) for solutions or to escape painful emotions. Of course, connecting with others is essential. However, using them to abandon emotions halts healing work - and your subconscious closet remains a mess.

WHAT WORKS

Finding comfort in the discomfort. Do not try to fix the pain or save it. Slow, sit with it, offer compassion and nurturance. Practice Emotional Health Skills, Self-compassion Practices, Urge Surfing, Grounding, and more. See Balance Home Page for practices.
 

“Even though this takes a considerable amount of time, the one thing I can promise is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Not just a makeshift work-around for symptom management, but actually feeling good at your core.” 

Jackson MacKenzie, Whole Again

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Avoiding, denying, reacting, blaming, distracting, obsessing, analyzing, or clinging to anyone or anything.

WHAT WORKS

Experiencing your thoughts and emotions. Patience, acceptance, kindness, and the 8 C's. Continuous practice so you may discover and cleanse deeper wounds.

“Like an ice cube, it will continue to melt and expose new parts of itself.”

Jackson MacKenzie

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Forcing, rushing, and berating yourself about how long it's taking to 'heal.'

WHAT WORKS

Slowing down. It is only natural for your energy levels to drop if you are experiencing depression, suffering a loss, heartbroken, etc. Sleep and digestion is impacted. Although this may feel frustrating, it is where you need to be to process and heal.

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Expecting to feel happy and spectacular after practicing mindfulness or emotional health practices a few times.

WHAT WORKS

Allowing the natural healing process. Experiencing the warmth of calm and joy that lifts during simple moments in life. Allow for moments of warm-fuzzies, clarity, self-connection and comfort within, feelings of “knowing” yourself, and realizing your rightful value and intrinsic worth as a human being.

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Using old coping methods, impulsivity, addictions, and obsession in an attempt to 'flee' painful feelings. Don’t let the pain control you - whether shame, guilt, anxiety, regret, anger, digust, etc.

WHAT WORKS

Focusing internally and practicing your new scientifically-proven emotional health skills, journal practices, breath work, grounding, going for a walk, stretching, yoga, centering, Urge Surfing, meditating, Self-Compassion practices, and more.

LESS

SELF-COMPASSION

Depression
Anxiety
Stress
Repressed Emotions and Shame
Loneliness
Relationship Distress
Fogginess/Confusion/Lack of Purpose
All or Nothing Thinking
Lack of Goal Attainment
Emotions Consume or Overwhelm You

MORE

SELF-COMPASSION

Joy
Capacity to Self-sooth
Calm
Accept Emotions and Forgive
Sense of Belonging & Connection
Real Loving Relationships
Clarity and Sense of Purpose
Balanced Thinking
Accomplish Goals
Emotions Inform and Motivate You

WHAT DOESN'T WORK

Resisting doubt, shame, anxiety, worry, and that Inner Critic that doesn’t think you can get better. What you resists, persists.

WHAT WORKS

Embracing your fear, doubt, shame and Inner Critic. Face your fears, doubts, and your Inner Critic and tell them with confidence, calm (and the rest of the 8 C's), that practice does indeed work with time. 

 

 

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Creating Your Balance LLC and information provided is not intended to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any disease or condition.  It is not intended to substitute for the advice, treatment and/or diagnosis of a qualified licensed professional. Creating Your Balance LLC and information provided may not make any medical diagnoses, claims and/or substitute for your personal physician’s care.