EMOTIONAL HEALTH

We aren’t born knowing how to identify, understand and process our emotions. It's a skill we must learn and practice. 

Build your emotional health skills and realize the profound benefits and empowerment of working with your emotions, instead of negating, shaming, or getting overwhelmed by them.

 

The Mood Meter, devised by Mark Brackett, author of Permission to Feel, provides a tool to identify your current emotion as specific as possible.

what emotions do for you

1

motivate for action & behaviors

Emotions get us to act ASAP! Ignite Fight/Flight response to protect us and save our lives! Emotions help us overcome obstacles and THREATS.

2

sense of purpose

Directly reveal our passions, dreams, interests, aspirations, desires and values. This requires being connected to your emotions. Otherwise you may feel like you are running on empty and lacking a sense of purpose.

"We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions."

- Brene Brown, PhD

3

CONNECT WITH others

Emotions connect us, attract us, bond us, create LOVE, TRUST and a sense of BELONGING. They allow feelings of love, care, joy, excitement and connection in relationships. They also help us maintain balanced boundaries

 

NOTE: Emotions are communicated in every moment - facial expressions, body language, tone, cues, vibe, demeanor, etc. Lack of emotional awareness may be giving off mixed signals, a disingenuous, confusing vibe.

Emotional health skills are cleansing... "delivering the body from functioning as a storage room for suppressed emotions brings a sense of natural love and ease, a spaciousness in the breath, that we commonly call happiness."

Somesh Curti, PhD

4

CONNECT WITH YOURSELF

Emotions give us important information that need our attention. For instance, anger reveals you have been violated on some level, real or perceived. Emotions provide insight that only you have access to.  This is also known as Self Leadership."

 

"Is frustration or any other 'negative emotion' useful or worthwhile?​ Every emotion is valuable. The trick is to actually feel it - and then fully accept it. Judging ourselves for feeling 'less than outstanding' or for being adrift from our divinity for a minute, or several months [even years] only keeps us locked in those negative states. If we're condemning it, we're creating 'stuck-ness'. When we wipe the residue of judgement off the lens, we can see where more positive options are waiting for us."  

- Danielle LaPorte, The Desire Map

5

reveal your reality

Emotions are direct links to the way you perceive yourself and the world around you; messengers that tell you how you're feeling, who and what is important to you, your values, fears, expectations, desires and more.

 

Hurt doesn’t go away simply because we don’t acknowledge it. In fact, left unchecked it festers, grows, and leads to behaviors that are completely out of line with who we want to be… that can sabotage our relationships and careers.” 

- Brene Brown, PhD

disconnected from emotions

merely sURViving
Disconnected from your emotions sets you up for an automatic threat response and amygdala-hijack - which disables access to your higher intelligence. This results in reactivity and living more like a lizard - as reptiles do not have the emotional capacity, nor intelligence that humans do.

connected to emotions

thriving
With emotional health skills you gain access to the infinite array of complex feelings we humans ingeniously generate in each moment, along with stable connection to your higher intelligence for rational, calm, authentic decision-making, rather than reactivity.

12 reasons emotional health skills are difficult

1

Alexithymia: subclinical inability to identify and describe your emotions

4

Requires self-awareness and working into maladaptive protective strategies. It’s work!

7

Requires curiosity, self-compassion, and courage to connect with emotions in caring, balanced way

10

Myths about emotions (seeing them as weak, shameful, annoying, scary, barriers, etc.)

2

Emotions aren’t always comfortable at first, so we tend to resist them

5

Toxic stress blocks desirable feelings such as joy (joy stems from Soothing System)

8

Over-thinking, over-analyzing, looping and shaming and judging painful emotions can block processing 

11

Requires full responsibility and self-compassion for our own emotions 

3

All emotions come from the same place (avoid pain, loose access to joy)

6

Emotions are spontaneous, 'childish,' and irrational - and aren't "perfect"

9

Lack of emotional attunement in childhood (common in our society, estimated at 36% of the population)

12

Fear of emotions due to past experiences of panic, shame, anguish, depression and more

four keys to emotional health

WELCOME all EMOTIONS equally

Even though we tend to dislike certain emotions, emotions themselves are not good or bad. All emotions are necessary and useful. It's the tendency to suppress emotions that increase their intensity and stir-up reactivity and negative behaviors.

identify multifaceted

emotions

Emotions are multifaceted and blend together. For example, jealousy is a blend of anger, sadness, and fear. Researchers propose we have 8 to 27 primary emotions - that mix like paint colors creating hues of approximately 34,000 distinguishable feelings.

understand

emotions are information

Emotions are information. Instead of automatically reacting or repressing emotions, learn to understand and process them. Emotions are not based on facts! However they are based on you: your unique perceptions, beliefs, experiences, and more.

realize INTENSITIES

SOFT, MEDIUM, INTENSE

Emotions exist at all times, ever-flowing like ocean wavesWhen   soft, you may not notice. AMEDIUM state (or "mood") you likely become aware of  thoughts associated. At INTENSE states they're obvious and detectable to those around you, whether you want them to be or not! 

 important note

The stronger the emotion, the stronger we BELIEVE it's based on fact.  

examples: “I am afraid so there must be immediate danger" (panic), “I love him/her, so he/she must be good for me.” IN FACT: The stronger your emotion, the more you need to pause (unless in immediate danger) and use emotional health skills.

 

STEPS TO BUILD emotional health

 

 

If you are experiencing a crisis or an emergency dial 911 or Crisis Response at 602.222.9444

© 2020 Copyright Creating Your Balance LLC

Creating Your Balance LLC and information provided is not intended to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any disease or condition.  It is not intended to substitute for the advice, treatment and/or diagnosis of a qualified licensed professional. Creating Your Balance LLC and information provided may not make any medical diagnoses, claims and/or substitute for your personal physician’s care.